Thursday, May 12, 2011

Moving Boxes & Making Affirmations Stick

I was working the positive affirmation angle years before I ever really believed the words I was telling myself. I was 17 years old when I started the internal chant of “I am healthy” It was after I had read Conversations with God, which speaks of the power of our thoughts I embraced the idea of telling myself, I already had what I wanted, rather than wishing for it. It was also around the same time that I realized my inability to love myself was a problem. So I began using affirmations to try to fix that, “I love myself unconditionally”

Over 12 years of affirmation and there I was- still depressed, unhealthy, unable to love myself- engaging in self-destructive behaviors with food and other vices.

You may relate. No matter how many times those around you tell you, how great you are. No matter how many times you send yourself positive thoughts – you find you still are unhappy, unsatisfied and unhealthy whether it is physical or emotional unwellness.

Although affirmations have a place, they don’t work alone.

They don’t work because the thoughts and beliefs we have ingrained in our minds are 1000 times more powerful than the flimsy little positive message you decide to put in today. You have reinforced the counter messages so many times, that those thoughts slip into well worn grooves, like clockwork.

You cannot change those negative messages by waging war with them- they will win every time.

You can enter into an arm wrestling match of affirmation vs. long standing belief with all the will power you can muster. You will probably hold off defeat for a few seconds, sweat pouring off your brow, veins bursting in your forehead, your arm locked in place…fighting….fighting…then all of a sudden BOOM! Your hand slams down…You lose!

Good Luck!
The good news, as powerful old beliefs are- they only remain that way if as you remain unconscious.

They are just thoughts after all, most probably untrue- many completely irrationally untrue. They lose all force, not by being challenged- but rather by being acknowledged. Acknowledge as merely thoughts, separate from your authentic self.

If you have any chance of believing positive affirmations, you know deep down are true…. You must first separate belief and thought from the essence of who you are.

I can best experience authentic self by dropping into my body. For me it’s my chest, for you it might be somewhere else. Consciously bring yourself from your head into an anchor in your body, whether it’s your chest, your belly, or your entire body. Feel the subtle vibration that happens when you breathe into that place. Your mind is still there, but it’s clearly separate from you. You have found your authentic self.

The more you connect with this self, the more you can see that your thoughts are not you. Magically they begin to lose power and disappear (at least temporarily) It is in the space that is created that affirmations stick. Instead of our minds using us, we can use our minds, to create our highest possible expressions in the world.

My life changed when I decided I wanted to live in the present moment more than anything. When we are truly present, we are connected to the authentic self. The more I was present, the more I was connected, the more I became aware of my old beliefs - they lost their power and retreated. In the space I put in “I am healthy” and “I love myself unconditionally” and for the first time they instantly stuck. They stuck not because they fit into well worn grooves; they stuck because they were in congruence with me- the real me.

Affirmations can’t live in a place that has no room for them. You can’t clear a room full of boxes you can’t see. Nor can you move boxes- if you, yourself are the box. You can move the boxes with ease, once you see them- and see them as separate from yourself.

Off to Co-Active Life Coaching Training this weekend.  Superpsyched to gain more tools, that can help me live my outer purpose in the world.