Friday, March 11, 2011

Stuck in the SUCK.

You have got to love those moments…

Those moments when you are smack dab, stuck in the suck.

I had one of those moments last night.

If you read my post this week, then you know I achieved my first RX kipping pull up on Monday (actually a did several of them). On Tuesday night, I couldn’t seem to do it again. I just chalked it up to sore hands and the fact that it was my 4th day in a row working out. I took a rest day Wednesday. I returned to the gym last night and couldn’t do it again.

I know I will get it back. Some day I will be do another RX kipping pull up. Someday I will do many strung together. Someday I will do dead hand pull-ups as well. However last night all I could feel was SUCK.

And not just SUCK about not being able to do a pull up. SUCK when a 245lbs deadlift felt heavier than I felt it should (even though 245lbs is HEAVY). SUCK when I felt like my back rounded during my deadlifts (even though my coach praised me on my form). SUCK that I felt like I had come to workout and done nothing (even though this morning my whole body reminds me of my deadlifts). SUCK that I felt like I was on the outside looking in at others socializing in the gym (even though I separated myself).

The truth is SUCK happens. And it happens every day. Somedays we accept it and move through it. Other days we get stuck in the suck.

When you’re stuck in the suck…life feels heavier than it should. When you’re stuck in the suck you feel like your doing everything wrong. When you’re stuck in the suck it feels like your going nowhere. When you’re stuck in the suck you feel alone and disconnected. When you’re stuck in the suck, what seemed so easy before…is so very hard.

We all have stuck in the suck moments. Not the moments where life is difficult externally, but the moments where internally we feel like it’s difficult regardless of what’s really happening. Moments where we lose presence and our highest possible selves cannot be expressed. Those moments are just as much a part of life as the moments where we transcend and achieve.

When we are stuck in the suck it feels impossible to become unstuck. If you are like me…you resist it. You natural instinct is to fight up against it. However what we resist persists. SUCK happens.

Nothing keeps you stuck in suck, more than trying to fight it. Sometimes we have got to just let it be. Embrace it. Stop trying to fight it and just allow yourself to be stuck. Today is not the day that you’re going to have a breakthrough. But this day is part of the process that will lead to your next one.


“Life is queer with its twists and turns, As everyone of us sometimes learns, And many a failure turns about, When he might have won had he stuck it out, Don't give up though the race seems slow, You may succeed with another blow, Success is failure turned inside out, The silver tint of the clouds of doubt, And be near when it seems so far, So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit, It's when things seem worse, That you must not quit.”



Crossfit Level 1 Trainer Certification tommorow!!! Can't wait!


equestrian57 said...

Thanks so much for this. I am STUCK in the SUCK today as well. Been doing so well following a paleo diet, then yesterday ate an ENTIRE bag of double-Chocolate Milano cookies. I never did that before, even when I was eating cookies all the time. What the hell?

Anonymous said...

It makes perfect sence actually...when we restrict ourselves their is a natural tendancy towards over eating the foods we are restricting. next time you deside take a non-paleo detour (which is unavoidable) be very mindful while you are eating. First of all decide to eat what you are eatng, without feeling quilty. Enjoy every bite every taste. my guess is being mindful, allowing yourself to enjoy the will not eat the whole bag. At any rate yesterday is, right now is another moment to be present to your body, its nourishment and your joy in all its forms!!!

Thanks for reading!

equestrian57 said...

Thanks, Stephanie!

Mel_Joulwan said...

Oh, man! I hear this... I was totally stuck in the suck last week. Nothing to do when you're there, really, but embrace it and ride it out. Hugs to you!

Rebecca said...

I keep coming back to this post whenever I am having a moment of "why can't I get it together all the time?" (like today when I ate half a pizza for dinner after resolving to get back on the paleo wagon after the weekend off).

Thank you for this post.